Home/ Weekly Services/Mission Statement/Our Leadership/Think On This/Youth Corner/Lessons & Sermons/Membership Check-In
Skyscraper Ministries/Lectures/Annual Baptisms/The Other Seventy Training Academy

All workshop materials within this series were written

by

Bro. Ammar Saheli & Sis. Tonya Saheli

Food for the Soul's of Women

The Strength of a Woman

Proverbs 31:10, 25

Lesson #1

 

Introduction

 

Usually when we think of a strong woman, we tend to attach societies definitions to her. Even the Christian woman may look at celebrities and politicians, such as Tina Turner, Hilary Clinton, Lauren Hill, Jackie-O, and Condaleesa Rice as strong women. Black women growing up in the seventies may have familiarized themselves with term “Strong Black Woman” using Angela Davis as a figurehead.  However, in using the life of the virtuous woman as a case-study (Proverbs 31:10-28), we find many of the powerful qualities cemented in God's strong woman. The love, work ethic, quality and care for others, behavior, motherhood, and wifehood of the God-fearing virtuous woman will be explored and discussed during this workshop.

 

 

 

She is Futuristic & Works While Others are Sleep

In looking at verses 13-16 and 24, of Proverbs 31, the strength of the virtuous woman is witnessed on four fronts.

 

  1. She had a solid work ethic.
  2. She operated in and out of her home for the welfare of her family.
  3. She worked while others slumbered.
  4. She was a businesswoman who planned for the future.

 

The strength of a woman is evidenced in her ability to carry out God's commands for her life. She works hard and is not confined to the walls of her home. She keeps her home, still benefiting, capturing, and using physical resources outside her humble abode.

 

She is not idle, for she knows the destruction and regression it can cause (Proverbs 19:15). She is not saddened or threatened by the career of her husband or the prosperity of other mothers and women in general. She knows she must satisfy God, her husband and children, or prepare herself for a husband.

 

The strong woman has an understanding of business, finances, and the importance of preparing and planning for the future. While others are sleep she is keeping her home and prayerfully plotting her next move. The virtuous woman considered (thought about deeply Proverbs 4:26) a piece of property and then purchased it. Notice her role and the apparent confidence her husband had in her (Proverbs 31:11). During this time of male orchestrated oppression of the woman, God still expressed the powerful abilities and talents of the strong woman.

 

 

Her Strength is Exemplified in Her Quality

 

Verses 17-22 and 27 clearly reveals a powerful and polished trait of every strong Christian woman. The virtuous woman houses within her heart, self-love and confidence. She believed in the best, therefore she provided the best for herself, husband, children, and poor.

 

The strong woman expects the best, which causes her to live a life of high standards. She practices what she preaches (Proverbs 18:24; Matthew 7:12; Luke 6:31). 

 

Her Strength is Known Through Her Speech

 

The need to speak evil, gossip, incite rumors, or speak negatively is a sign of the contentious woman. In general, some humans feel better when they can cut someone down. In doing so many feel elevated. However, in Proverbs 31:26 the behavior of the virtuous woman addressed the contrary. As biblically commanded, she spoke with wisdom, maintaining words of kindness. The strength contained within the woman allows her to speak in love (Jackson, 2003).

 

The strength contained within the strong woman prevents her from biting and devouring individuals and groups with her lips (Galatians 5:15). The strength of the strong woman allows her to master her tongue, which in turn allows her to bridle her body (1 Corinthians 6:12; James 3:2).

 

 

Her Strength Inspires Respect

The speech, disposition, and behavior of the virtuous woman caused her husband, children, and those in her presence to speak highly of her. In essence, the strength of a woman is manifested through her grave disposition. Note the Greek definition of grave. For a man to qualify for the formal church office of a deacon, he and his wife must be grave (1 Timothy 3:8, 11). The Greek term for grave is Semnos and it denotes a person who is venerable and inspires reverence, simultaneously displaying a quality that invites and attracts (Vine, Unger & White, 1985; Vine, 1981) .

Verse 28 displays the results of the type of grave attitude all Christian women should possess. The children of the virtuous woman referred to her as blessed and her husband praised her. One scholar said in regards to her children, “…They pray for her, and bless God that they had such a good mother” (Henry, 1991).

 

 

Conclusion

In this brief case-study approach to the life of the virtuous woman, several applications are made in relationship to the strength of today’s Christian woman. The following is a list of evidences of the strong Christian woman:

 

  1. She understands that her first priority is to please God.
  2. She operates in and out of her home for the welfare of her family.
  3. She refuses to be idle and confined to her home.
  4. She is qualified in maintaining the business and financial matters of her home.
  5. She plans for the future of her family and is not lazy.
  6. She maintains a high level of confidence, faith in God, and her husband.
  7. She desires quality and provides the same to her family and the poor.
  8. She speaks with wisdom and kindness.
  9. She inspires respect from others.
  10. She is deeply appreciated, loved, and adored by her husband and/or children.

 

 

 

Food for the Soul’s of Women

The Faith of a Woman

Esther 2:15 & 4:15-17

Lesson #2

 

Introduction

 

The story of Esther is one of awesome power and faith. The positions that she held and maintained as a Jewish woman for the welfare of her people, were utterly amazing. Initially, using her life as a brief case-study, we will examine her faith, then explore the faith of other Christian women. Because of the power contained in our theme text, the two passages are provided with the theme phrases underlined.

 

Ø      Esther 2:15  Now when the turn of Esther, the daughter of Abihail the uncle of Mordecai, who had taken her for his daughter, was come to go in unto the king, she required nothing but what Hegai the king's chamberlain, the keeper of the women, appointed. And Esther obtained favour in the sight of all them that looked upon her. 16  So Esther was taken unto king Ahasuerus into his house royal in the tenth month, which is the month Tebeth, in the seventh year of his reign.  17 And the king loved Esther above all the women, and she obtained grace and favour in his sight more than all the virgins; so that he set the royal crown upon her head, and made her queen instead of Vashti.

 

Ø      Esther 4:16  Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish.  

The Story: Faith Evidenced by Restraint, Influence, & Sacrifice

King Ahasuerus (Xerxes) of the Persian Empire, ruled from his throne and palace in Shushan, the regions from India to Ethiopia (Esther1:1). During his reign (486-465 B.C.) the Jews were in exile and the king called for his queen Vashti, but she refused his command (Esther 1:10-12; 2:6, Nelson, 1986). This displeased the king and he followed the suggestions of his officers and began preparing for a new queen. Many virgin women were brought to the king for his selection and through Gods providence Esther was among the number (Esther 2:2-8).

 

Every potential queen had to present herself before the king in her most beautiful kingdom selected attire. Esther could have selected whatever she wanted but instead she requested that the chamberlain, Hegai, select for her because she knew that he knew exactly what appealed to the king. The restraint of Esther to indulge herself in a personal royal make-over, resulted in her selection as queen (Esther 2:17). 

 

At the time of becoming queen, Esther had no idea of the plan God was orchestrating. She simply knew that by becoming queen she would be in a position of power and could begin to empower a power-stripped Israel. During her time as queen, Haman (a man above all the other princes, Esther 3:1-2) developed a plot to destroy the Jews (Esther 3:8-9). Word about the trouble produced by Haman made it back to Esther from her adopted father Mordecai (Esther 4:7-9). Mordecai and Esther exchanged dialogue about the condition of the Jews and her strong influence and faith was clear.

 

Ø      Esther 4:16  Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish.  

 

The second marvelous faithful trait of Esther was her influence on her non-Jewish maidens. She had enough influence to cause them to fast for her cause. Thirdly, she was willing to risk her life. She said, “If I die I die.” The attractive and dynamic faith of Esther was breathtakingly courageous (Fields, 2001). Because of her faith, Haman was killed on the same gallows he prepared for Mordecai (Esther 7:9-10), she remained queen, and her adopted father became second in command to the king (Esther 10: 1-3).

 

Like the virtuous woman, Esther had confidence and knew that for increase to occur she had to decrease (Proverbs 31:30; John 3:30).

 

 

Examples of other Faithful Women

Sarah: Of course Sarah had issues with her faith at times, but imagine her faith at the time God commanded her husband Abraham to murder their son Isaac (Genesis 22:1-2, 10-12). Her lack of faith could have disrupted major blessings (Genesis 22:18). Her faith included sacrifice.

 

The Faithful Harlot: In I Kings 3:16-28 the faithful harlot and mother of a baby boy had enough faith in Solomon and his judicial system for her son to be saved from a brutal death of being cut in half. Her faith included sacrifice (Fields, 1996).

 

Jochebed: In Exodus 2 and Hebrews 11:23 the faith of the mother of Moses is witnessed as she refused to allow her infant child to be drowned, as was the Pharaohic command (Exodus 1:22).

 

 

Conclusion

Faith, confidence, and belief in God are all traits of a strong Christian woman. Beautiful Esther exemplified faith as did a plethora of other biblical women. For the Christian woman to live of faith, the following scriptures must be understood and practiced:

 

Ø      Romans 10:17

Ø      Hebrews 11:1

Ø      James 1:5-7; 2:18; 2:26

 

 

Food for the Soul’s of Women

The Content Woman

Luke 10:38-42

Lesson #3

 

Introduction

In looking at the lives of two religious sisters, Mary and Martha, the disposition of contentment is found in one of them. Through comparing and contrasting their mentalities the characteristics of a content women will be explored. The Bible says, “But godliness with contentment is great gain” (1 Timothy 6:6; See Hebrews 13:5).

 

 

Mary & Martha

The Bible describes Mary and Martha as both being strong women. However, Martha was perplexed about tending to all of her houseguests. Her motives were good, noble, and rooted in service. Yet and still she was concerned about her sister Mary leaving the feet of Jesus to help her serve. Martha was anxious, stressed, and worried about her personal service because she had many people to serve, including Christ. She asked Jesus to instruct Mary to help her (Luke 10:40).

 

Martha “became so weighted and burdened down, so tired and fatigued, so pressured and tense that she lost her priority [and] became aggravated and critical of those who were not helping” (The Preachers Outline & Sermon Bible, 1998, p. 1302).

 

Despite the chaos and service needed, Mary remained totally content at the feet of Jesus. She was probably just as dedicated to service as Martha was, but once she saw Jesus she selected the good part (Luke 10:42).

 

 

The Quick Application

Mary did not just sit at the feet of Jesus, she focused upon His Words, the everlasting water and bread of life (Matthew 4:4; John 4:14). In the midst of tribulation, trial, and trepidation, the content Christian woman knows how to navigate her way to the feet of Jesus, finding rest, consolation, and contentment in His Words. Mary was in the same chaotic house as her sister, but she remained content. A psychiatrist once said in regards to her delusional and psychotic patients, “Your crisis is not my crisis.” Author Betty Burton Choate (1999) said, “No church can become strong unless it has strong spiritual women, so women need to devote to a study of the scriptures” (p. 121).

 

 

The Discussion

The virtuous woman, Esther, and Mary were all content because they knew in whom their strength rested, having faith, confidence, and trust in the LORD. God cannot use the double-minded woman (James 1:8; 4:8) because she is never content, failing to know what she wants until she sees it in or on someone else. This was the case with the laborers (Matthew 20:1-16) and Ananias and Sapphira (Acts 5:1-11). The laborers were pleased with their salary until they saw others receive the same pay for less work. Ananias and Sapphira were content giving their money toward God’s Kingdom until Satan convinced them to keep a portion for themselves (1 Timothy 6:10).

 

How Does She Become Content?

Like every content woman must, the apostle Paul figured out how to navigate to the feet of Jesus in all conditions and seasons of life (Philippians 4:11, 13). He understood that he could do it all through Christ. Faith in Christ brings a life of contentment. The content woman is excused from jealousy, envy, coveting, and strife because she is satisfied with the Godly provided essentials of life (1 Timothy 6:6-8).

 

 

What Does She Look Like

 

In 1 Timothy 5:10 the works of a content seasoned Christian woman are categorized and they will be contrasted with the contentious woman (1 Timothy 5:11-13) in the next section. Along with the characteristics of the virtuous woman, Esther, and Mary, the content woman:

 

Ø      Is dedicated to the Word of God

Ø      Has good works

Ø      Successfully raises children

Ø      Takes care of the neglected

Ø      Washes the feet of the saints

Ø      Relieves the afflicted

 

Conclusion

The content woman understands Matthew 6:33 and believes she can do all things through Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:13). In short, the content woman is only concerned about the things of others in how she may serve them. She is not concerned about acquiring the things of others because she is content and confident in what God has provided her.

 

 

 

Food for the Soul’s of Women

The Contentious Woman

1 Kings 21:23-26

Lesson #4

 

Introduction

The church, society, and families are plagued by contentious women. The contentious woman is basically the woman that nobody wants to be around, and the mother whose daughter prays to never be like her. Beginning with a look at the characteristics of a biblical contentious woman named Jezebel, we will begin our investigation of the fatal danger posed by contentious women.

 

 

Terminology Defined

The Hebrew word for contentious is Madown and the Greek word is Philoneikos. Based on the Hebrew and Greek definitions the contentious woman is defined as the woman who loves to brawl, creating strife and discord (Strong, 1881). In the Greek philo is defined as dear, and neikos is defined as strife. The contentious woman is a lover of conflict and strife.

 

 

Scriptural Passages Designed for the Contentious Woman

·        Proverbs 21:9  It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

 

·        Proverbs 21:19  It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

 

Ø      Proverbs 27:15  A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

 

 

Contentious Jezebel

Ø      1 Kings 21:23  And of Jezebel also spake the LORD, saying, The dogs shall eat Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel. 24  Him that dieth of Ahab in the city the dogs shall eat; and him that dieth in the field shall the fowls of the air eat. 25  But there was none like unto Ahab, which did sell himself to work wickedness in the sight of the LORD, whom Jezebel his wife stirred up.

 

Ø      Kings 9:33  And he said, Throw her down. So they threw her down: and some of her blood was sprinkled on the wall, and on the horses: and he trode her under foot. 34  And when he was come in, he did eat and drink, and said, Go, see now this cursed woman, and bury her: for she is a king's daughter. 35  And they went to bury her: but they found no more of her than the skull, and the feet, and the palms of her hands.

 

Contentious Jezebel had no respect for prophet Elijah (1 Kings 19:2-3), ordered the deaths of prophets (1 Kings 18:4), orchestrated a scandal of pride (1 Kings 21:4-6, 8), and had Naboth executed for his land (1 Kings 21:12-13). Ahab had no business uniting with Jezebel in marriage and she simply exacerbated the sin problem of Israel. Only the evil and sinful probably liked Jezebel. Nobody wants to be around a contentious woman. The contentious nature of Jezebel led to her death. Even the dogs refused to eat the parts of her body she used to concoct her evil schemes: Head (containing brain & speech organs) hands, and feet.

 

Ø      2 Kings 9:30  And when Jehu was come to Jezreel, Jezebel heard of it; and she painted her face, and tired her head, and looked out at a window.

 

Make the connection and keep in mind, before Jezebel faced her death she was in hiding. How often it is that when the plots, rumors, gossips, slanders, and games of the contentious woman are exposed, she attempts to hide. She, like Jezebel, will throw rocks and attempt to hide her hands.

 

 

Other Contentious Women in the Bible

Sarah: At a certain stage in the life of Sarah, she presented with contentious behaviors. Look at the table below:

 

Text

Contentious Behavior

Impact on others

Genesis 16:1-2

Discontent with barrenness

Abraham slept with handmaid/Hagar.

Genesis 16:4

Jealous of Hagar’s pregnancy

Hagar mistreated.

Genesis 16:4-5

Fabricated story about Hagar’s disposition

Abraham crossed, Hagar slandered & forced to leave. Eventually they returned.

Genesis 21:9-11

Family strife & dislike of Ishmael

Abraham grieved by Sarah’s attitude.

Genesis 21:10, 14

Sarah wants them dismissed again

Hagar & Ishmael sent away for good.

 

 

Job’s Wife: The wife of Job was consumed by contention. At Jobs weakest point she urged him to curse God and die (Job 2:9).

 

Potiphar’s Wife: Potiphar was a powerful man in Egypt and had to have been an awesome provider for his wife. Surely he had no problem with resources, yet his wife was not content because there was a new man on the block who was handsome, mighty in faith, and self-integrity. She was not content with her husband because of her own lusts, and on several occasions attempted to seduce Joseph (Genesis 39:7, 10-12). After Joseph refused, she became remained so contentious she attempted to ruin his name by falsifying a rape charge (Genesis 39:13-14).  

 

Based upon the aforementioned ladies of the Bible, including the conduct of Rebekah toward her favored son Jacob (Genesis 27:6-13), notice that their contentious behavior negatively impacted the lives of mostly innocent prey and subjects. The recipients of human darts of contention are simply the victims of misguided psychological projections of others.

 

Mother of all Mothers: Eve was informed of God not to eat or touch the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 3:3). However, Eve grew discontent with the command and ate of the tree, also giving to her husband. The sin of Adam and Eve introduced sin to the world. Again, notice the impact of the discontent behavior on others.

 

The Bible describes the lifestyles and characteristics of many contentious women. Delilah refused to leave Samson alone until he relented and relinquished his secret (Judges 16:6, 10, 13, 16-17). She stirred Samson until he was sick inside. Zeresh, the wife of Haman, provided him with the idea of building the gallows for the sinful attempted execution of Mordecai (Esther 5:14).  The grandmother of King Asa had to be removed from her office of queen because she set up an idol for worship (2 Chronicles 15:16).

 

 

Quick Observation

Notice some key characteristics of contentious women: Often times they are unsatisfied, discontent, and unhappy with their life, past, present, or a combination. These dispositions have an ill effect on the church, family, and society.

 

 

The Panacea for the Contentious Woman

As was discussed in our characteristic investigation of the content woman (1 Timothy 5:9-10), we now look at some things that lead a woman into a contentious disposition, followed by Gods remedy.

 

Based upon (1 Timothy 5:9-10), widows sixty years of age and above and married once are to be enlisted in a special ministry of women. In early New Testament times, these were women who dedicated themselves to ministry and consented to remaining single and celibate. To illustrate the point we look at the pertinent scriptures from the Hebraic-Roots Version New Testament and The New Jerusalem Bible.

 

Ø      1 Timothy 5:9-14“Therefore, you should choose a widow who is not less than sixty years [old], who was [married] to one man, 10  and has a testimony of good deeds, whether she brought up children, or received strangers, or washed the feet of set-apart-ones, or relieved the afflicted, or walked in every good deed.11  But from those widows who are young excuse yourself, for they will become torn concerning the Messiah, and will desire to be married. 12 And their judgment is set because they have denied their former faith. 13 And they also learn laziness while circulation among the houses, and not only laziness, but also to talk too much and to distract themselves with vain things, and to speak that which is not proper. 14 Therefore I desire that those who are young marry and bear children and direct their homes and not give to Ba’al Zebub even one cause for reproach” (Trimm, 2001, p. 496).

 

Ø      1 Timothy 5:9-14 “Enrollment as a widow is permissible only for a woman at least sixty years old who has had only one husband. 10  She must be a woman known for her good works—whether she has brought up her children, been hospitable to strangers and washed the feet of God’s holy people, helped people in hardship or been active in all kinds of good work. 11 Do not accept young widows because if their natural desires distract them from Christ, they want to marry again, 12  and then people condemn them for being unfaithful to their original promise.13  Besides, they learn how to be idle and go round from house to house; and then, not merely idle, they learn to be gossips and meddlers in other people’s affairs and to say what should remain unsaid. 14 I think it is best for young widows to marry again and have children and a household to look after, and not give the enemy any chance to raise scandal about them” (Wansbrough, 1985, p. 1962).

 

In looking at the provided versions above, deeper insight is gained into the characteristics of the New Testament Christian contentious woman and how she arrives at contention. The apostle Paul preached that it is better for a woman under sixty to be married and for faithful widow, sixty and above, to dedicate her life to ministry. This special dedication to ministry consisted of house visitations and the tending to the needs of other women. This was and is truly a ministry for the seasoned, mature, and experienced in Christ. In Paul’s Holy Spirit given theology, he described the possible characteristics of single/widowed younger Christian woman. Paul desired young Christian women to be married to prevent from becoming:

 


1.      Lazy

2.      Idle

3.      Gossipers

4.      Meddlers

5.      Tattlers

6.      Busybodies


 

Paul preached that the younger woman should marry, dedicating her time to the business of her home, husband, and children. A woman with a husband and family has no room to be contentious because the care of a family is a full-time job and ministry alone. God initiated this fact when he spoke of the woman being saved through childbearing (1 Timothy 2:15). “And as the mother does her mothering from day to day, she should grow in her God-given abilities, becoming ever more loving and patient and wise in dealing with her children. Thus, her own life is enriched and made more godly through developing in the work God has given her to do” (Choate, 1999, p. 26).

 

 

Conclusion

God is seeking the content woman over the contentious woman. A woman who has the gift of spiritually living a single life should do so and dedicate herself to the ministry, but Gods divine plan is for her to get married. The contentious woman has a negative impact on those around her, and particularly those she unleashes her Jezebelish attacks upon. All Christians need a contentious Jezebel  in their life because she will keep a saint humble and bowed in prayer. However, may God’s grace be upon the Delilah-like contentious woman, because like Jezebel, her hiding will not last forever and her fate is hell unless she repents.

 

 

 

Food for the Soul’s of Women

Spiritual Conflict Resolution

1 Corinthians 3:1-3

Lesson #5

Introduction

Successful conflict resolution is essential to wholesome living. In the church, it is vitally important and can only be accomplished on a level of true spirituality. In the Pauline apostolic letter to the saints in Philippi, he instructed them in how to deal with a conflict that ironically was the result of a contention between two Christian women, Euodias and Syntyche (Philippians 4:2). As stated before, the results of contention impacts more than just the contentious. In this case, the church was suffering because of the schism between two church members. Paul was in prison at the time of writing his address, yet his conflict resolution was simple. He instructed the church to follow the conflict resolution pattern he learned and practiced: “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14). In spiritual conflict resolution Paul did three things.

 

  1. Kept the past in the past.
  2. Moved progressively forward every day.
  3. Pressed to be more like Christ daily.

 

In looking at the framework of Paul and Christ, we will investigate the necessary methodologies for spiritual conflict resolution.

 

 

First Things First

 

Ø      1 Corinthians 3:1  And I, brethren, could not speak unto you as unto spiritual, but as unto carnal, even as unto babes in Christ. 2  I have fed you with milk, and not with meat: for hitherto ye were not able to bear it, neither yet now are ye able. 3  For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men?

 

Before true spiritual conflict resolution can begin, a confession of existent problem(s) must commence. The church at Corinth had problems because the behaviors of envy, strife, and division were among them. Congregations that are plagued by these attributes must admit that carnality is in the midst before spiritual restoration can begin. Paul could not talk to his brothers and sisters in Corinth on a deep level because they were carnal. Nothing will be resolved through carnal dispositions.

 

 

The Proper Response to Sin & Conflict

In 2 Kings 22:11 and 23:3, Josiah responded to the sins of Israel by renting or tearing his clothes. His behavior indicated godly sorrow and a penitent disposition. In Nehemiah 1, Nehemiah responded to the results of Israel’s sin by praying to God in tears, followed by serious physical and spiritual behavior (Fields, 2001, p. 632). In 1 Kings 3, the true mother of the baby boy sought the wise counsel of Solomon to restore the situation. In all three of these situations rested a conflict. The resolve of the conflicts were dependent upon a righteous outlook of the situation, a wise mediator if it could not be resolved between the plaintiff and accused,  actual spiritual and physical work, and sincere prayer to God.

 

 

Conflict Distorts Worship

 

The passage generated below speaks to the necessity of spiritual conflict resolution. Conflicts have the ability to gender deeper and multiplied conflict(s). When Christians are engaged in personal, dyadic, or triadic conflicts, they must be resolved before true worship can begin.

 

Ø      Matthew 5:23  Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; 24  Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.

 

Through the process of spiritual conflict resolution, all parties must behave as Christians. God commands the offended party to approach the guilty in a confidential setting so integrity can be maintained (Matthew 18:15). The conflict should not be discussed with several people before the other party is addressed. When the latter occurs integrity is lost because people are informed of the problem unjustifiably. God prefers His children to resolve conflicts with the least amount of fuss and fanfare possible.

Ø      Matthew 18:15  Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.

 

Resolutions to spiritual conflicts are never easy, but because of love they are necessary. The apostle Paul had to confront his fellow apostle, colleague, and warrior of the cross about his religious error. We believe that Paul confronted Peter about his discriminatory attitudes because he loved him (Galatians 2:11-12). Regardless of the reason the conflict had to be resolved. Spiritual conflicts are only resolved when spiritual people are involved. Jesus said, “Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you” (Matthew 7:6). In addition to the latter passage, we must also incorporate the words of Paul to prevent unnecessary conflicts, “But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes” (2 Timothy 2:23).  Spiritual conflicts cannot be resolved when one of the parties are habitually carnal!

 

Although spiritual conflicts are often unavoidable, troublemakers can be identified. Rogers (1998) noted five characteristics of the troublemakers that surrounded Nehemiah and his restoration work (p. 103). They laughed at his good work (2:19), ridiculed the small beginning (4:23), threatened the workers (4:2-8), attempted compromise (6:1-9), and infiltrated the camp (6:10-14). Contentious people exhibit the same behaviors today, primarily subverting other souls to their contrary ideas.

 

Ø      Galatians 2:11  But when Peter was come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed. 12  For before that certain came from James, he did eat with the Gentiles: but when they were come, he withdrew and separated himself, fearing them which were of the circumcision. 13  And the other Jews dissembled likewise with him; insomuch that Barnabas also was carried away with their dissimulation.

 

 

The Solution of Paul

The apostle Paul discovered the perfect remedy for spiritual conflict resolution. He wrote the Philippian letter as an address to help the church resolve and respond to the conflict of two sisters, Euodias and Syntyche. The schism between the two sisters in Christ was having an adverse impact on the congregation.

 

Ø      Philippians 3:13  Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, 14  I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

 

The solution of Paul was to forget about the past and live for the current and the future. In the process of spiritual resolution, an attitude of each day is a new day is central for spiritual success. Someone my ask the question of “What if someone continues to sin against me? How many times should a person be forgiven?” Our Lord and Master Jesus said,  “…I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven (Matthew 18:22).

 

 

Conclusion

 

The God inspired and Pauline established principle in Philippians 3:13 must be sustained to ensure solid church growth and healthy spiritual relationships.




Food for the Soul’s of Women

She Must be Dignified, Qualified, & Certified

Titus 2:3-5

Lesson #6

 

Introduction

Having looked at the strength, virtue, faith, and contentment within the solid Christian woman, we now investigate more qualities imbedded in her nature. The Christian woman who lives according to the divine mandates in Titus 2:3-5, is the one who is dignified, qualified, and certified to be an example, teacher, counselor, mentor, and advice giver to other Christian women. Christian counsel is a serious matter in the Body of Christ and women often need a strong sister to communicate with. The posed fatality in this reality is approaching the wrong sister for precise advice and guidance. The woman of God must live her life in a way that makes her dignified, qualified, and certified as an influential woman in the Masters Kingdom.

 

 

Titus 2:3-5, An Analysis

 

Ø      Titus 2:3  The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4  That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5  To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

 

As Christians search for the qualifications of elders and deacons it becomes abundantly clear that they are characteristics all men and women of God should possess (1 Timothy 3:1-16; Titus 1:7-16). The same premise is in operation for all women according to Titus 2:3-5.

 

The Bible instructs the church that in every congregation their should be a sanctified (set-apart) group of women who have dedicated themselves to a specialized type of ministry, related to the service of other sisters (1 Timothy 5:9-10). The latter text is also synthesized with the words of Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:8-9 & 32-34.  In essence, this would be the group of women in whom other women could look to for guidance, in addition to their preacher(s) and elders. Sometimes a congregation is hard pressed to find a solid group of women who have totally committed themselves to this ministry. It is the duty of the local preacher to teach women in such a fashion so they develop critical and spiritual characteristics. The dignified, qualified, and certified sister in the church lives by the code of our theme text. Paul gave Titus four female Christian characteristics by which to identify and certify this special group of Christian sisters:

 

  1. Holy behavior
  2. Negates slanderous speech
  3. Is not consumed by alcohol
  4. Teaches for edification

 

 

 

1.      Behavior as becometh holiness:  She carries herself in a holy fashion. The Greek word for holiness is Hieroprepes and denotes sacred behavior. This Christian woman exudes integrity, and dignity, which makes her qualified in deliverance and certified by God’s standard.

 

2.      Not false accusers: She is not a woman who spreads rumors, supports, or instigates them. She takes care of her own business and refrains from the dispositions and behaviors of a weak Christian.

 

3.      Not given to much wine: She is not a woman who gets caught up in the consumption of alcoholic beverages.

 

4.      Teachers of good things: She teaches good and wholesome spiritual things both verbally and non-verbally.

 

The preacher(s), elders, and faithful husbands of the church, train women in this fashion so they can in return and service, be an example to younger Christian women. Therefore, for a Christian woman teach, mentor, or counsel another, she must be living according to the divine standards of a solid saint. A Christian woman who is not living a Christian life is not qualified to advise another Christian woman (Romans 2:21-24). The sisters who meet the four qualifications are certified as exemplary Christian women. Paul charged Titus to instruct these women to teach other women in eight areas:

 

  1. Self-control
  2. Marital love
  3. Maternal love
  4. Discretion & discernment
  5. Virginity maintenance
  6. Familial watch-guards

7.      Benevolence

  1. Marital submission

 

                                        

  1. Self-control: The dignified, qualified, and certified Christian woman is to teach younger Christian women how to be sober, self-controlled. A woman who exhibits no self-control, regardless of her age, has no authority to instruct or guide someone in this area. In addition to this fact, Christian women must be careful in who they seek out for advice.

 

  1. Marital & Maternal love: The certified woman saint must be able to instruct younger women in how to love their husbands and children. Notice how the sisters in 1 Timothy 5:9-10 possessed theses qualities. Because they were able to sustain a marriage, God granted them spiritual permission to lead younger women in this arena. It also must be noted that these women vowed to remain a widow for the cause of Christ. It takes a woman who has loved or loves her husband to be able to teach another woman how to do the same things. A sister who could not maintain her marriage or is totally negative on the topic of marriage cannot successfully teach a younger sister how to love her husband.

 

  1. Discretion & discernment: The certified woman saint also lives a discrete life. She is a woman of discretion. The Greek word for discrete is Sophron and denotes a person who places limitations on their freedom. This kind of woman is holy and sanctified, meaning she lives a pure life protected by personal boundaries and restraints. Only the woman who can place limits on her freedom, as evidenced by Esther (2:15), can teach another woman to do the same. A limitless woman cannot teach a woman or child how to create personal limits.

 

  1. Virginity maintenance: The concept of training young girls to be chaste is almost non-existent in society today. It appears to have reached an almost miniscule level among members of the church as well as preachers of the cross. The Greek word for chaste is Hagnos and it has several implications, one being virginity. The certified, qualified, and dignified sister is not afraid to converse with younger women and even female children about virginity. Young girls are commanded to be trained in maintaining their virginity until marriage. In a Christian sense, virginity can be restored once a non-married believer repents and refrains from sexual activity. Women who ceased having premarital sex because of their intimate relationship with Christ and His cross, have a powerful lesson to share with younger women. Women who maintained their virginity until marriage have an even more potent testimony that must be shared. Again, it takes a woman who has lived or is living a chaste life to train a girl how to maintain her virginity.

 

  1. Familial watch-guards: The certified woman is charged with teaching younger women how to be keepers at home. Truly, the only way a sister can teach this lesson is to have lived it or be living it. To teach a woman how to be a good wife, mother, and maternal watch-guard of her home and family, can only come through personal praxis. A woman who hates to be at home, detests her marriage, regrets her children, despises cooking for her family, and is looking for the first opportunity to divorce, cannot teach a soul about keeping a home.

 

6.      Benevolence: Like the dignified, qualified, and certified virtuous woman, the solid Christian woman must be good. The Greek word for good is Agathos and it denotes a person of benevolence and profit. In other words this is the woman who makes strong contributions to all situations. She is the grave woman who inspires respect and men and women welcome her opinions and candor. It takes a good woman to teach another woman how to be good.

 

  1. Marital submission: The last qualification Paul gave Titus in this list, was that the older woman must be certified to teach younger women how to be obedient to their own husbands. Without getting into a lengthy dissertation, only an obedient wife can provide this type of wisdom to another current or potential Christian wife. The Christian wife who values other men over her husband, usurps authority, ridicules, disrespects, distrusts, or fails to submit to her own husband cannot teach another woman how to be obedient to her own husband.

 

The seasoned and certified Christian woman has a grave responsibility. It is through her righteous behavior and conduct that the sanctity of the Word of God can be spread and sustained. God urges seasoned sisters to do all they can to maintain this order personally and in others so that “…the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:4).

 

 

The Necessary Inference

 

God expects for His children to live obedient lives. He also expects individuals in need of spiritual guidance to seek out spiritual people. Rehoboam sought the advice of his worldly peers as opposed to his spiritual elders and it resulted in kingdom division and eventual malicious oppression (1 Kings 12). The people that Rehoboam sought for guidance were not spiritually qualified and they provided poor counsel. In addition to the preacher, when necessary, Christian women must seek out spiritual Christian women for counsel. Often times the flesh is appeased in seeking out a non-spiritual soul that will concur with the current position of the flesh. The person sought should be the faith based Christian of proven experience and righteousness.

 

 

Supporting Passages & Applications

 

Ø      Galatians 6:1  Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

 

In situations of conflict a person who lives spiritually must be involved in the restoration process. Similarly, when a person is experiencing personal internal conflict(s) they need to seek a spiritual person. The term ‘spiritually’ comes from the Greek word Pneumatikos and denotes a person who is supernatural, the opposite of mere naturalness (1 Corinthians 2:12-16). When seeking advice, the Christian must seek the person who is truly following Christ in Word and deed.

 

Ø      Romans 15:1  We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves.

 

 

Exemplary Women

 

Again, the prerequisite of spiritual strength in Christ is of grave importance in the arena of guidance. The Bible provides a laundry list of dignified, qualified, and certified godly women, many of which have been discussed previously. Just to name a couple, observe the passage below.

 

Ø      Romans 16:1  I commend unto you Phebe our sister, which is a servant of the church which is at Cenchrea: 2  That ye receive her in the Lord, as becometh saints, and that ye assist her in whatsoever business she hath need of you: for she hath been a succourer of many, and of myself also. 3  Greet Priscilla and Aquila my helpers in Christ Jesus: 4 Who have for my life laid down their own necks: unto whom not only I give thanks, but also all the churches of the Gentiles.

 

Phebe was not a “deaconess” in the church but she was a qualified servant (Whiteside, 1988, p. 239). As a servant she was apparently entrusted with the work of God and her spiritual brothers had confidence in her ability. The same was true for Priscilla, a woman who worked closely with her husband and Paul the apostle in the business of teaching the lost.

 

 

Conclusion

 

All Christians must strive to live a life that qualifies them to be a spiritual help to others. In addition, when counsel is being sought, a wise, seasoned, and tried Christian who practices what they preach should be the target.

 

 

 

 

 

References

 

Choate, B. B. (1999). The role of woman. Winona, MS: World Literature Publications

 

Fields, F. (2001). Old testament history: An overview of sacred history & truth. Joplin, MO:

      College Press Publishing.

 

Henry, M. (1991). Matthew Henrys commentary on the whole Bible. Hendrickson Publishers,

      Inc. (Electronic Database)

 

Jackson, W. (2003). Words fitly spoken. Gospel Advocate, 145, 34-35.

 

Nelson, T. (1986). Nelson’s Illustrated Bible Dictionary. Thomas Nelson Publishers.

      (Electronic Database).

 

Rogers, R. (1998). Bible history II: A study of Joshua through Malachi. Lubbock, TX:

      Sunset International Bible Institute.

 

Strong, J. (1881). Strong’s exhaustive concordance of the Bible. Peabody, Mass: Hendrickson

      Publishers.

 

The Preachers Outline & Sermon Bible. (1998). Vol. 1. Chattanooga, TN: Leadership Ministries

      Worldwide.

 

The pulpit commentary. (2001). Biblesoft (Electronic Database).

 

 Trimm, J. S. (2001). Hebraic-Roots Version New Testament. Hurst, TX: Society for the

      Advancement of Nazarene Judaism. 

 

Vine, W. E. (1981). Vine’s expository dictionary of old and new testament words. Iowa Fall, IA:

      World Bible Publishers.

 

Vine, W. E., Unger, M. F., & White, W. Jr. (1985). Vine’s complete expository dictionary of old

      and new testament words. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Publishers.

 

Wansbrough, H., & York, A. A. (1985). The New Jerusalem bible. New York: Bantam

      Doubleday Publishing Group, Inc.

 

Whiteside, R.L. (1988). A new commentary on Paul’s letter to the saints at Rome.

      Bowling Green, KY: Guardian of Truth Foundation Publications.

Zodhiates, S. (1991). The Hebrew-Greek key word study Bible. Chattanooga, TN: AMG

      Publishers.